Tuesday, October 13, 2009

Hello Earthlings

So I've managed to flag my own blog as having objectionable content. That surely must be the result of my spacecomputer's strained compatibility with this playground you call the interwebz.

In the interest of full disclosure, I am a xenopologist from a distant star system, sent by my home world's scientific community to do a lengthy observational study of your ways. The idea at the time was to better understand what your species had to offer ours, what resources you could bring to bear on my home planet's thirst for knowledge and wisdom.

After years of unceasing surveying, studying, interaction (in disguise of course) and listening, I have come to the conclusion that humans *need* more help than they can offer. And while I am but one representative of a planet that strives for compassion, peace and truth, I believe I can offer you some guidance, should you be in need and not afraid to ask.

Fear not, I am not from a race like the Vulcans, or a robot. My people have emotions, and we very much take them into account in our wisdom-sharing. Logic is not always our highest value; the absurd is certainly appreciated!

In the meantime, I will probably be answering letters sent to other, less-green-skinned advice offerers.

Oh, yes, there is something your people have to offer the universe. I can't believe I nearly forgot: LOLcats. I like them so much I occasionally cast human situations in their voices.

If you like what I have to say (or not) please let me know in the comments! I do this because of YOU. And my absurd love of getting comments. Really, it gets kind of lonely up in the rocket.

1 comment:

  1. Is your observation akin to what a fly on the wall does? Is that why you're communicating on the fly... sorry, puns are getting away from me, I'll think I'll try to meet you for a chat on the moon....

    (So glad to hear your orbiting wisdom again)